Cold Sores

Saturday, January 18, 2014

Cold Sores

This picture is actually on the downside of the outbreak when they were healing.
I had three different coldsores - two under my lip and one on top.

I have never in my life have cold sores - until the day I came home from the hospital. I had no idea what they were. Andrew said cold sores (which I promptly ignored because I don't get cold sores), Mom said a rash of some sort, and Peggy (long-distance) guessed allergic reaction to something. My neighbor said herpes - and that freaked me out. Isn't that an STD? Then she explained that oral herpes is the medical name for cold sores. I spent a little time with google and I had to agree with her diagnosis. It was obnoxious.

Then I went to my doctor appointment and when I mentioned the cold sores to my doctor she FREAKED out. She told me that the herpes virus is EXTREMELY dangerous to infants and that if Laurie caught it from me it could be "really really serious". So I went home and googled that. Turned out that by "really, really serious" she meant DEADLY.

Needless to say, things got tense after that. I mean - I still don't know how I got them. And now I have this extremely contagious virus that I can spread to my infant daughter by kissing her (which I had already done a lot of) and if she gets it, she can die.

The doctor had wanted us to go straight from my appointment with her, over to the pediatrician. It was late enough in the evening, though, that the pediatricians office was closed and it would have been an ER visit. The on-call pediatrician and my doctor conferred and said that they both felt like I could wait until the morning for a regular office visit, if that was my preference. It was.

But then I couldn't get Laurie to wake up to eat and I was nearly in tears and ready to head to the ER when Andrew got home from work. But he is magic with her and was able to wake her up. Then she stayed awake for SIX hours! I felt like she was so tired but couldn't fall back asleep without me kissing her. It was the saddest thing ever to not be able to kiss her cute little face.

As it turns out, one of the reasons that the doctor was so concerned is that they actually had an infant death as a result of herpes just a few months ago. The baby was ten days old when he died. And to make it more crazy - neither of the parents had herpes.

In the mean time, I've offered lots of prayers to keep Laurie safe and have had my heart broken over and over again at the thought of losing her. So far she seems to be a healthy and thriving little girl and as much as I love her being a good, long sleeper - especially at night, I am almost more happy to have her wake up and eat.

Tired but happy mom with the cold sores almost gone.
(But still not comfortable kissing my baby which is SOOOO sad!)

I am almost to the point that I don't worry about being contagious anymore, but it is always possible that she caught the germ but it isn't manifesting yet, so we aren't completely past the worry phase. However, each day brings me greater confidence and relief. From what I have read online, it sounds like the first month is the most risky, so as much as I don't want to wish away a single day with her, I am looking forward to getting to that milestone.

And in the mean time, let me just say that I HATE knowing that I am carrying around a disease inside of me that can surface at any time and can easily be spread and shared. It is a gross and completely disgusting feeling. If I weren't so busy being concerned about the LIFE of my child, I would be really bitter that I somehow picked this up. UGH.

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Family Proclamation

The First Presidency and Council of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

We, the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator's plan for the eternal destiny of His children.All human beings—male and female—are created in the image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and, as such, each has a divine nature and destiny. Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose.In the premortal realm, spirit sons and daughters knew and worshiped God as their Eternal Father and accepted His plan by which His children could obtain a physical body and gain earthly experience to progress toward perfection and ultimately realize his or her divine destiny as an heir of eternal life. The divine plan of happiness enables family relationships to be perpetuated beyond the grave. Sacred ordinances and covenants available in holy temples make it possible for individuals to return to the presence of God and for families to be united eternally.The first commandment that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and wife. We declare that God's commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force. We further declare that God has commanded that the sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife.We declare the means by which mortal life is created to be divinely appointed. We affirm the sanctity of life and of its importance in God's eternal plan.Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. "Children are an heritage of the Lord" (Psalms 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed.We warn that individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.We call upon responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society.

This proclamation was read by President Gordon B. Hinckley as part of his message at the General Relief Society Meeting held September 23, 1995, in Salt Lake City, Utah.